Legend has it that Guy Fawkes was a guy who had only one job. He was supposed to guard the explosives that were placed under the House of Lords by an organisation called Gunpowder Plot in an effort to kill King James I. Guy Fawkes had only one job, to protect these things until they blew up, but he got arrested and the whole plot failed. So November 5 is popularly known as Guy Fawkes Day where people make fires, or light up fireworks to show how rebellious they are.
But down here, in Satafrika, we put our own little spin into it. We don’t do fireworks before the December bonus kicks in. We are very smart. First of all we don’t call it Guy Fawkes Day because we just don’t care. On the 5th of November it’s Penny Penny, not Penny Penny Ahee, but Penny Penny Guy Fox. If you don’t know, on Penny Penny kids dress up in their parents/guardians clothes and walk around the neighborhood singing songs that don’t rhyme and if you happen to stop the kids so that they sing for you and whoever is next to you, you have to pay them after they’re done with their out of sync routine. That’s how it works. Think about it like this; it’s the cheapest version of Halloween you could ever find.
The culture is slowly dying out, less and less kids are doing it. Kids these days only care about two things: Social media and Nasty C. If you are none of the above and you manage to get their attention, congratulations, you might just have all the answers.
I don’t blame them though. Every generation is different. I just wish kids born in 2000 going down would realise that happiness is free. When we crossdressed for Penny Penny and walked around happily singing and dancing for ten cents, it didn’t mean we had no worries.
Some of us were abused, some of us were abused and watched our mothers being abused as well, some of us questioned our sexuality but didn’t find answers, some of us were hungry and relied on Mgavava or Malebese at school for a meal, some of us were orphans parenting kids who were two or three years younger than us.
I’m not comparing the pain but kids these days sink into depression over pointless things like a parent taking a phone as punishment, a boy not texting back, their moms not buying them Abiter shoes that cost over R2000. Kids should let themselves be kids again, share this article with your children and if they don’t wanna read it beat them! Ngeke sizwe ngabo!
Thank you for reading. I beat kids me, I don’t have time for nonsense.